Dealing with a Bully Pt.1

There are two ways to deal with a bully, sometimes you have to face them, the decision to face a bully is the hardest, gut wrenching, sweat inducing experience that you might ever face. But once you go toe to toe with the bully, you realize they have no power. However, you might have to put distance between you and them. Either way you will win the day.

I have faced many bullies in my life, and the one thing that I have learned is that bullies come in all different shapes and sizes. They aren’t specifically male, they don’t always have to come from a disadvantaged childhood but they all have one thing in common – they are sad individuals.

My biggest bully I have ever had to face was when I was in the fourth grade. I went to a private school that was predominantly Navajo and Apache students. In fact there were only five white kids in the entire school. It was a K-12, and 2-12 were all in the same room.

Albert was a senior, he was tall and strong, and he had told me he hated white boys. Every day he would pick on my brothers or me without any provocation or repercussions. 

One day Albert was in a particularly bad mood, and I was his target dejour. He pushed me, he hit me, he threw things at me, and at lunch he ended up ripping my new jeans. I was diry, bloody and my clothes were ruined. He just laughed.

Photo by Anna Tarazevich on

My dad picked us up from school, and took one look at me. He was mad – I thought that Albert was going to finally get what he deserved. 

We made it home – a 12 mile trip – without a sound. My dad took me to his room and gave me the spanking of my life. I didn’t understand. 

My dad then told me how to take down Albert. He said that I should drop to the ground and bite his leg. 

The next day, I did what my dad said, and I took a chunk out of Albert’s leg – which got me suspended from school.

Albert was a bully, but he was not the only bully I had to deal with. I didn’t realize it at the time, but my dad was a bully too. 

I watched my dad bully my older two brothers, my mom and then my children. He tried to bully my wife, but she would have none of it.

Photo by mohamed Abdelgaffar on

I had to distance my family from my dad, because of his angry outbursts, and how he was bullying my children. We moved away from him and about seven years later, my father died. I wasn’t there when he passed. Later I found out the extent to his bullying when talking to my children. It grieved my heart when I heard what he did to my kids. If you have to walk away from a bully, do it sooner than later. 

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